CONSIDER THE TOILET
MENTIONED: KOHLER, BAILEY HIKAWA, WIM WENDERS, TOILET ERASURE, SLAVOJ ŽIŽEK, BODE, STANLEY KUBRIC, LOS ANGELES, TOKYO; NEW FEATURE: "BUSINESS OPPORTUNITIES"
Dear Snoops,
The bathroom is second only to “KITCHEN” in terms of archi-décor expense, guided in form by its DEEP, DEEP and frequently-reiterated socio-cultural importance – one that is mainly obsessed with BATHING CULTURE – i.e. the “tub”, i.e. the aesthetics of “BODY CLEANSING AND CARE”. Tub is “Moment of peace,” “There’s room in here for two,” purification and absolution. It is also often heightened to status as PERSONAL SANCTUARY.
TAKE FOR EXAMPLE Japan-obsessed American artist LEONARD KOREN, who in his very short manifesto called “UNDESIGNING THE BATH” (1996; ISBN 1-880656-24-8) describes the bath as “A PLACE THAT HELPS BRING MY FUNDAMENTAL SENSE OF WHO I AM INTO FOCUS.” Heavy!
AND YET, SOMETHING IS MISSING:
… what of “THE AESTHETICS OF ELIMINATION”1, i.e. in particular, the role of the toilet?
THE TOILETS IS: necessary daily use (you hope), “RELIEF”, “I’M BUSYYY!!!!!!” (shouted at whoever is jiggling the doorhandle) – and yet it is also a symbol of the learned shame of an activity essential to life.
TWO OBSERVATIONS:
In the canon of Great Décor Texts (i.e. The House Book by Conran, The House Style Book by Sudjic, the Slesinworld books et al.) attention is paid to the toilet only to the extent that ‘it should be placed and not there’, etc. (i.e. Bathroom Arrangement). Where, by contrast, great odes are paid to the ‘TUB’ (ASIDE: what a stupid word)
A unifying factor of culturally signification places in Los Angeles is that toilets experiment in COLOR AND CONTEXT, and in particular, are non-white.
EXAMPLES:
We can see ALL TOO frequently an aversion to TOILET, and the elimination of the Elimination Aesthetic, here for example in Internet-famous bathroom-sculpture by Dutch resin-obsessive Sabine Marcelis.
EXAMPLE OF TOILET ERASURE:
TO BE DISCUSSED TODAY:
Slovenian Marxist SLAVOJ ŽIŽEK on diverse Euro-Western toilet ideologies, for your consideration
Current reevaluations of “TOILET”: KOHLER’s “NUMI 2.0” and the absolute shenanigans of the marketing images by photographer-to-the-stars Douglas Friedman (who notably also shot a Ivanka Tr*mp perfume campaign [yikes], but ergo maybe understands the ‘CAMP’ dimensions of NUMI more than Kohler does?)
TOILET CORRESPONDENT AMY FUSSELMAN on WIM WENDERS on TOILET CLEANING
GOOD TOILETRY and also the toilet seats of BAILEY HIKAWA
MARKET GAPS in TOILETRY.
*IMPORTANT NOTE: We are highly aware that we’re taking a VERY NORTHERN-WESTERN P.O.V. on TOILETS and elimination. But, it’s just what we know personally and have the life experience to be able critique.
First, briefly, to add as much GRAVITAS as possible to “TOILET”, before we discuss AESTHETICS:
1 → THE ŽIŽEK TOILET ANALYSIS, EURO/ANGLO-SAXON EDITION
Toilet design is not apolitical. As wacko-Marxist Žižek reminds as “ideology is at work precisely where you don’t think you will find it.” He finds it in the toilet.(Because brainy people do, in fact, love to “TALK SH*T”.) Here is Žiž, comparing the toilets of Europe and America, swiftly arriving at some very accurate cultural understandings:
“In a traditional German toilet, the hole into which sh*t disappears after we flush is right at the front, so that sh*t is first laid out for us to sniff and inspect for traces of illness. In the typical French toilet, on the contrary, the hole is at the back, i.e. sh*t is supposed to disappear as quickly as possible. Finally, the American (Anglo-Saxon) toilet presents a synthesis, a mediation between these opposites: the toilet basin is full of water, so that the sh*t floats in it, visible, but not to be inspected.”
— SLAVOJ ŽIŽEK
He goes on to explain these toilet styles as reflections of certain BROAD SOCIO-CULTURAL MINDSETS, which ABSOLUTELY TRACK:
If one knows Germans, the French, and Americans, one should feel the QUAKE OF ACCURACY. THE POINT BEING: One could hardly do the same with ‘TUB’. Tub is (more often) personal choice; Toilet is culture.
THE OTHER POINT BEING: But, doesn’t it make the rather simplistic cultural of bathing (“restoration”, “relaxation”, “communion”) seem kind of dull in comparison to the cultural FORCE of toilet?
Sadly, he doesn’t go into various non-Western elimination setups.
On insanely misguided TOILETry:
2 → TOILET MARKETING ENTERS NEW ERA, BATTLING TOILET WHITENESS
FOR THOSE NOT IN THE TOILET COMMUNITY: May we introduce NUMI 2.0.
The NUMI 2.0 by Kohler is a truly absurd “SMART TOILET” that sells in the +$10K range. To describe it in brief:
→ When closed, has the look of a partially-glowing cube (the kind of aesthetic adopted by people who admire Steve Jobs but don’t understand him)
→ Lid opens mechanically and slowly, so one should hope not to be in a rush
→ Still has Basic toilet seat
And, whether you are compelled by “SMART” toilets or not, the NUMI 2.0 is undeniably an insider’s toilet: as in, you have to have been briefed on how to use it. It’s look is FORBIDDING, SINISTER, and also DESPERATE (desperate to be ‘something’). But what is more interesting is the attempt by the KOHLER MARKET DEPT. to rocket the NUMI so beyond any Earthly function that it appears truly as KUBRICKIAN, alien monolith (like, in obvious reference):
REMINDER, Kubick’s use of MONOLITH as “MOMENT OF EVOLUTIONARY TRANSITION”:
AND YET, may we recall that in “2001”, the monolith first signals the arrival to the apes of weapons and war (and so on, up to nuclear bombs); the monolith, ergo, is menacing. Technological advancement UPSETS a certain peace. So, a curious choice for KOHLER and the creative force of this, DOUGLAS F. to be like, “this TOILET WILL BRING WAR”
TOILET (for Kohler) = MENACE?
[MARKETING SIDE NOTE: Kohler also NUMI’d a midcentury home on FIRE ISLAND and had some attractive homosexuals fawn over it – which, as homosexuals, we can tell you would never happen with the Numi. This toilet is decidedly VERY STRAIGHT-MASCULINE (like Kubrick, obsessed with technological ‘advancements’ that, in fact, do harm); and it is very Straight to view the gaze of Gays as that of ‘tastemaker’.(Douglas F. is also a homosexual.)]
But, Kohler is tearing itself in two directions, because it’s ALTERNATIVE to psycho-techno-menace is DEEP NOSTALGIA. (In both cases, thought, a worthwhile attempt to disrupt the contemporary image of the SINGLE WHITE TOILET.)
DEEP NOSTALGIA OF TOILET DIVERSITY for KOHLER:
Kohler’s alternative challenge to White Toilet took the form of a public vote on ‘Which Historical Toilet(etc.) Color’ to return to production (celebrating 150 years of ‘bold’ looks). Those colors were:
→ SPRING GREEN (1927-1944)
→ LAVENDER (1927-1944)
→ PEACHBLOW (1934-1973)
→ SUNRISE (1953-1969)
→ AVOCADO (1967-1979)
→ PINK CHAMPAGNE (1973-1979)
AS PER:
Anyway, also AS PER, the public f*cked up, choosing PEACHBLOW and SPRING GREEN, which are emotionally the same thing.
Regardless, the result is another menace: to “MAKE TOILETS GREAT AGAIN” by simply leaning into the crutch of “HERITAGE” and populist ploys. Where is the work of “RELEVANCE”?
So few try to make something both AESTHETICALLY COMPELLING and RELEVANCE-COMPELLING. Where Kohler tries to be HYPER-RELEVANT with the Numi, and ergo make it seem kind of ominous in its overextension, it tries to simply tell us that an Intern*t poll means we should like them.
POINT OF VIEW: there many ways to f*ck with toilet that aren’t (1) too much or (2) too lazy.
PARTIAL TANGENT: LOOKING BACK THAT ISN’T NOSTALGIA
We expect you’ve have seen the new REBRAND of non-toilet people IITTALA, which falls in line with a few other recent-ish rebrands that excavate old looks and refresh their contexts. But, you know what, it’s not “nostalgia”, it’s smashing old into new. And that’s an important differentiation. (We like it.)
HERE.ANOTHER TANGENT: STARING AHEAD THAT STOPS US FROM ‘JUST STARING’
We continue to rail against the technological colonisation of home, including Apple V*sion “Pro” DOMINATION OF TOILET EXPERIENCE. The most radical act in today’s world is to be removed from a screen, and we would like to advocate for TOILET potentially becoming this place – and yet, the tech-industrial complex doesn’t agree.
TO SIT AND ELIMINATE AND SIMPLY STARE INTO SPACE is a wonderful proposition.
BACK TO CINEMATIC TOILETry:
3 → A SPECIAL REPORT FROM TOILET CORRESPONDENT (AND PROLIFIC AUTHOR) AMY FUSSELMAN, who has extracted for us crucial TIPS FOR TOILET CLEANING from WIM WENDERS’ “PERFECT DAYS”
“At the heart of Wim Wenders’ new film about a toilet cleaner in Tokyo lies an unexpected question: ARE YOU O.K. WITH CLEANING TOILETS?
Wenders’ fictional hero, Hirayama, is more than OK. He is a taciturn, cleaning savant whose modest life is rich with kindness, generosity, and appreciation.
How can one improve one’s approach to cleaning one’s own toilet?
KEY TAKEAWAYS:
AN ATTITUDE OF “PRESENCE”
The first rule of toilet cleaning is ACCEPTANCE OF THE JOB. Hirayama’s young co-worker labors inattentively and haphazardly, sometimes scrubbing while watching his phone: he is also miserable.
Hirayama, in contrast, is resolutely calm and present for the task, even using a small, hand mirror to inspect how well he has cleaned. AIM FOR THAT LEVEL OF “BE-HERE-NOWNESS”.
AN ATTITUDE OF “PRIDE”
Do NOT approach scrubbing your toilet feeling sorry for yourself. You are not a loser who can’t afford to outsource this work: you are a perceptive and intelligent human who understands that the fact that you pee and poop is evidence that YOU ARE ALIVE. Cleaning your toilet means that you’re literally taking care of your shit. This is important work; take pride in it.
SARTORIAL EXCELLENCE = TOILET EXCELLENCE
Hirayama dresses for toilet-cleaning success in a bright blue jumpsuit with a snappy white towel draped around his neck. Find a similarly uplifting, stylish ensemble to wear when you clean your toilet.
Perhaps you want to imagine that Wim Wenders is filming you washing your Washlet. And then, there you are, like the actor who portrays Hariyumi, getting your Best Actor award at Cannes. BRAVO!
TOILETS, IN BALANCE
Even if you make your living cleaning toilets, your work takes only part of your day. HOW DO YOU LIVE THE REST OF YOUR LIFE? Hirayama may spend a lot of time peering into the bowels of toilets, but he also spends an inordinate amount of time looking up at the *TREES AND SKY*, reading good books, listening to good music, and generally being kind. [N.B. It’s also worth noting that he has a flip phone, isn’t on social media, and doesn’t know what Spot*fy is.] In short, are you OK with cleaning toilets? Then you are OK.
**THANK YOU AMY!**
4 → TOWARDS A GOOD TOILETry
There are many, many, many excellent BATHROOMS. Rare - AT HOME - is the toilet an experience unto itself. (Many restaurants succeed, however. We shall not expand on this.)
We have discussed it in relationship to KINK (here):
And, also return you KARL LAGERFELD’S OLD PLACE:
Toilet not present in the Karl pic, but it was our introduction to the GERMAN CONCEPT of the “WOHNBÄD” i.e. the living bath i.e. the bathroom as communal space. The communal bath fetish of the northern hemisphere (Japan, Turkey, Russ*a, Scandinavia, etc.) but pairing CLEANLINESS with ELIMINATION.
Here from ALEXANDER KIRA’s 1966 “THE BATHROOM”:
Of this, Kira says: “THERE IS VIRTUALLY NO LIMIT TO THE AESTHETIC, PHILOSOPHICAL, OR FUNCTIONAL APPROACHES THAT CAN BE TAKEN TOWARD THE BATHROOM ONCE ONE FREES ONESELF FROM THE SHACKLES OF STEREOTYPED THINKING.” Very much approve.
And that brings us some simple options for WILD EXPERIMENTATION and to an “OF THE MOMENT” toilet experimenter, BAILEY HIKAWA. Who, in contrast to KOHLER, infused toiletry with technology as such:
Part of a series of absurd and focus-pulling seatery that ranges from HAIR to CHAMOMILE and challenges the idea of “NO FUN” toilet.
BUT FEAR NOT, there have been more elegant approaches that connect toilet to broader sense of joy and fun. Again, we’ll look back to a domestic space we have discussed, THE ROGERS HOUSE (by Richard R. for his parents):
A CLASSIC décor technique of using COLOR to “TIE THINGS TOGETHER”, with little bloops of RED. But, toilet rises from NECESSITY to ACCESSORY.
But what both BAILEY and ROGERS have in common is the decision not to erase or fear TOILET, and ergo to appreciate ELIMINATION as a moment of life-saving RELIEF. We ask you to consider ways you might do this.
5 → “BUSINESS IDEAS”
A final note, why the f*ck aren’t there a zillion great options for toilet flushers? This is what we spent quite some time talking about with
over iced matcha-pistachio at CANYON COFFEE in LOS ANGELES. And where we request you don’t take this business idea, we also do want to see it in the world.But, that is enough toilet talk for now. We just want you to appreciate, consider, and not fear THE TOILET. It’s very good for you, it’s very interesting.
Until next time. Love and good luck,
TERMINOLOGY TAKEN FROM “THE BATHROOM”, ALEXANDER KIRA, 1966, ISBN:: 0-670-14897-0